I'm sitting in a classroom waiting to see if anyone's going to show up for Audio/Visual training. (We have 10 classrooms each of which have their own cabinet with computer, digital projector, VCR/DVD combo, speakers, etc., and in order to get a key to a cabinet, you must go through training. I've been referred to as the Key Nazi! Nice, huh?!) Thus far, I've been sitting here for an hour with no signs of life. Only 2 more hours to go. :P But, hey, it's given me a chance to catch up on everyone's blogs and post to my own!
Anyway, as I've been sitting here, my mind has wandered back to the times in my childhood/teens when someone made a comment to me about my weight. I was always a little chubby as a kid (I remember having to wear "Husky" size jeans/pants from Sears), but it wasn't until middle school when it really sunk in and became a conscious problem for me. The first incident involves my grandmother (my mom's mom) while my brother and I were on a trip to Gettysburg and Washington DC with my grandparents in their camper. (Somehow, my sister got out of that trip; I was so mad at her!) We were staying the night at a campground somewhere near Gettysburg, and my brother and I had been swimming. When I came back to the camper from the pool in my bathing suit with my towel wrapped around me, my grandmother sat me down and proceeded to tell me I was getting too fat and needed to be more diligent about watching my weight. I was _so_ mortified! I remember doing my best to get out of there as soon as possible and then crying myself to sleep that night. I was about 10, I think, and no where near being obese for my age.
Incident 2 took place in Jr. High. Imagine a line of 7th grade girls and boys all lined up in the gym waiting (or dreading in my case) to get on a scale so as to complete an exercise in health class. When it was my turn, I made my way up to the scale with fear given that the teacher had been making a point to practically shout out everyone else's weight so that another (inept) teacher could write them down. All of my friends were behind me, so I hadn't yet heard their weights when I stepped on the scale. The teacher shouted 108 lbs to the other teacher writing everything down, and I didn't feel too badly. Then, one by one the rest of my friends were weighed, and they were all under 100 lbs. Much of a weight difference, no, but I couldn't believe I weighed _so much_ more than everyone else!
Then came the 3rd incident. I was in High School now, and because of playing tennis, my constant diet efforts and other activities, I thought I looked pretty good and for the most part felt ok about myself. Being the good preacher's daughter that I was, I went to church every Sunday morning and night. There was this one man in the church with a rather subservient (and overweight) wife and domineering MIL. One Sunday when I was sporting my favorite mini skirt and U of Florida sweatshirt, he decided to stop me in the sanctuary to tell me I was getting a little fat and needed to watch my weight. Whhaaaaatt???!!! Who was this man that I barely knew to tell me anything about my weight?! But did that matter? Nope, not at all; the damage was done. And, to this day, I remember it clearly.
Why do I tell you about all these things? Well, they were incidents that have stuck with me most of my life and affected how I have felt about myself. Do I think they had a hand in making me obese, probably not. But, I know I'd think about them when I was feeling particularly badly about myself, and I'm sure they had their unconscious effects too.
Did you have any incidents like these? How did they affect you?