22 November 2005

Just too much!

I've got so much stuff swirling around in my head right now; it's difficult to get it out. We've had to change our Thanksgiving plans because my MIL has been having a difficult time recovering from sinus surgery. So, my husband has wisely decided it's best not to stress her out more with our (and our dog's presence). Thankfully, I was able to get a reservation at a nice restaurant that's going to be open as I'm just not up to making a full Thanksgiving dinner for two.

And, my grandmother was recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer and began chemotherapy treatments last week. My mom talked with her on Friday and relayed that she sounded pretty upbeat about it. Then, yesterday, we all learned that she had to be taken back to the hospital due to being unable to deal with the pain caused by the chemo on her own. She's always been a very strong woman, but she's never handled drugs very well. So, the entire thing is all rather scary.

In the months prior to when my dad's mom passed away, I'd managed to lose about 20 pounds doing a doctor supervised low-carb diet. But, losing her caused me to give up on that diet so as to comfort myself with eating whatever I wanted. So, I'm beginning to stress out that if we were to lose my mom's mom that I might somewhat do the same again. I know my body won't let me lose all control, but I can still eat things I shouldn't, graze (which is something I've managed not to do thus far) and stop exercising. I know that it's good that I'm at least cognizant of the potential, but it's so difficult to remain aware when dealing with such grief. Here's hoping she can make it through the chemo as easily as possible and that it will help.

Oh, and I only lost 1 pound this week. Better than nothing or gaining, but it's not the 5 I was hoping for. Although, now that we're not going to my MIL's for Thanksgiving, I have more time to get lower before we see them at Christmas.


Dagny said...

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jenn said...

sorry to hear about your grandmother. i think it's so hard to balance out what we want for ourselves with what happens in our lives! i'm going through a really hard breakup with my partner (wife) of 7 years. it's really hard! but in those moments, i just try to do the right thing, and most of the time i do - and i keep losing. don't fear what might happen, just take it one choice at a time. you look fantastic!

Sandi said...

Sorry to hear that you're getting the triple whammy this month. Not fun. It's hard to remember to take care of yourself in the middle of all that madness, but man, it's just so vital. Remember the YaYa Sisterhood line: There is no problem a walk can't help... best wishes to you.

The Catapillar said...

It always comes in threes. I will be praying for you and your family. Happy Holidays

Jenn said...

Thanks, everyone, for your kind words of encouragement! Thankfully, my MIL's doing better and my grandmother's home from the hospital. Hopefully, the positive trend will continue!