01 November 2005

Unhappy Halloween

We had not one trick-or-treater last night. I'd even dressed up as a spider lady for the day ready to give out candy to the kids. Our neighbor told us not to expect many kids, if any, but I put up lights and carved some pumpkins. So, I thought maybe that would help encourage the few kids in the neighborhood to come down, but alas, not a one. I truly do not understand why, but this fact depressed me. So much that I had a strong desire to eat some of the candy I had ready to give out; the chocolate just smelled so good. I refrained, but it was really hard. And, that, honestly was the first time since surgery that I'd had such a desire to use food as a comfort. Up until today, I honestly believe I've just been using food to sate my hunger. I'm not saying I've been perfect (I've given in to reduced-fat potato chips a few times.), but I really think I've done well at not using food to make me feel better emotionally. Last night sucked, though, to say the least.

Speaking of despressing subjects, my sister had to have an emergency appendectomy last week. They were able to do it laparoscopically, so I've been trying to help her by describing my experience with laparoscopic surgery. But, as of today, she's still feeling weak, is coughing and has had signs of a fever. So, the Dr. told her to go back to the hospital for more tests. Her 9-year-old is taking it all pretty hard (given that their house mostly burned down a little over 2 months ago and she was already stressed out about that), and it just kills me that I can't be there to help. Both of their girls are heavily involved with activities, and couple that with the stress of school, losing just about everything you own (which is your whole world when you're 9) and having your mom unexpectedly go into the hospital for surgery, it's amazing these girls don't break down more. I just wish I could do more.

On to happier things, though. People are really beginning to notice (and comment on) my weight loss! I went to a Chinese restaurant with my parents this weekend that my husband and I used to frequent quite often. We'd been there regularly enough that the waitress/owner had gotten to know us. So, when this weekend I walked in by myself and didn't receive the normal warm welcome I'd become accustomed to, I was surprised. I thought it might be due to the fact that we hadn't been there in a while, but once my parents arrived, she recognized them right away. And, then it clicked; she came over to give us our menus and said to me, "You're so skinny! I didn't recognize you!" Dang, did that feel good!!


Holly said...

woohoo.. you're skinny!

Kaye Bailey said...

"You're so skinny!!"


Best wishes,