10 December 2005

My life was shattered yesterday

My husband came to my office just a few minutes before I was scheduled to leave to tell me he was leaving me; he wanted a separation agreement and a divorce. It kills me to write this, but I have to get it out. I'm at my parents' house about an hour from where we live, and my sister is coming up from Alabama to try and help. I am beyond devastated. We didn't argue or fight, but I guess that's because he didn't tell me when I did things to upset him. I had no idea this was coming; I have no idea what I'm going to do. I don't feel strong enough for this. There's a slight chance he'll give us a chance ... to try and work things out. So, he's agreed to see me Monday morning. I'm having such a hard time eating; I try to eat and can hardly get anything down. I'm drinking a lot of water, but I'm crying so much. I couldn't sleep last night; my parents just don't know what to do with me. I know they're trying, and I know it's killing them too. Our dog, Koba, won't stop looking for him. When I made it back to our house after leaving my office, I found everything that was his gone. I miss him so much; I miss his smile, the way he hugged me, the way he laughed, the way he smelled. I'm so lost. I'm just so lost.

7 comments:

jenn said...

Oh Jenn, holy crap. I think you know my partner of 7 years did a similar thing to me in early October (we were married and everything - own a house, had a dog...all that). I still cry everyday I think. I sooooo understand! Don't worry about eating right now; just go to Starbucks or something to get a little something in. I didn't worry about it for a few weeks (and, well, dropped some pounds, which after the fact I was quite happy about...but that will come). Send me an email @ jennisagemini@yahoo.com with your personal email and/or phone number - let's chat some more.
~Jenn

Sandi said...

OMG JENN OMG... What a terrible shock. I am crying as I reread your post. I'm so sorry. I wish there was something that I could say or do. My heart goes out to you. Like Jenn above, if you want to talk, I'll be happy to give you my number. Just email me and I'll send it to you. sandihooper@yahoo.com

The Catapillar said...

Jenn, My heart goes out to you. I will keep you in my prayers.

Marla said...

Jenn I am so truly sorry. I wish there was something I could do or say. But, I wouldn't even know what to say other then I am sorry. If you ever need to chat my email is marla@migglah.com I don't want to post my cell phone # but I will totally give it to you if you email me. Again, I am here for you if you need someone to listen. You are in my thoughts.

Marla said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Holly said...

ah jenn... that really is terrible. i'm sorry. maybe the counselling will be a new start.

when i have been upset before it has been hard for me to eat, so i understand. concentrate on liquids and vitamins, food will come back in it's own time.

Kaye Bailey said...

Jenn - -

My thoughts & prayers are with you.

Kaye